Tuesday, May 19, 2015

One of those days.

It happened early last week
 but the image has been seared into my brain;
and it's changed everything.

Let me back up ...

Contrary to the Attitude Adjustment Device,
I was NOT set between 'patient' and 'Light and breezy'.

I was permanently set on 'crabby', 
wondering why 'totally pissed'
wasn't even a category!

I had been in and out of offices all week,
in our building and those in other agencies,
bitching about all the things that weren't going well 
with this whole new job and clinic thing;
reminding folks
 - both in our Administration and those in state agencies - 
about the promises they'd made months ago 
which, by and large,
 they have yet to live up to.

Grumbling all over town 
about the likelihood that I'll never get
massive intractable systems 
to play nice with each other, 
even for the welfare of innocent children.

I left each office 
hearing their reasons for delay 
as self serving rationalizations;
seeing each occupant as obstacle.

While driving back to the office 
after yet one more frustrating 
non productive encounter, 
down a road I've driven to and from court for decades, 
I saw a sign that spoke 
directly to my heart.

I circled the block
to come back 
to take a picture.

A sign that seemed to ask 
What if -
just what if -
instead of perceiving everyone I'm dealing 
with in all those offices as obstacles
in this new, 
being built from the ground up 
way of being a medical home for vulnerable children 

what if
I believed
and lived out
the knowledge
 that we are ALL part of the
Beloved Community;
each with our own gifts,
our own contributions to make,
our own role to play
in the making of this new venture;

what if I was intentional about remembering 
before entering any office
that it holds a member of Gods beloved community ...

what if?
It didn't escape my notice 
that the Beloved Community is undergoing repairs;
it might have solid bones
but there's always work to be done!

We've not achieved a state of perfection -
and undoubtably won't in my lifetime.

At that moment,
and continuing on into this week,
I'm content with being one of the workers,
 up on the scaffolding,
trying to repair some of the damage.
(In my matching jacket, of course!)

The metaphor is holding;
it's helping.

The attitude adjustment barometer 
might just be shifting back toward  'Patient' - 

believe me when I tell you
 that's a HUGE paradigm shift!

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