Sunday, May 3, 2015

You can take the girl out of the ER...

but you can't take the ER out of this girl!

I've seen too much;
I've heard too much.

My innocence is shattered.

It's absolutely impossible for me 
to see things in a benign way,
devoid of double entendre
and hidden meaning.

But even if you aren't pervy like me,
take a look at these images from children's books.


Does no thinking person proof read these things?

All my friends who ride horses have talked about 'the tingle'...
I thought it was a country version of an urban myth!

What child would think that?
Even worse, what child's 'illegal things' would involve barnyard animals?
Come on - 
that's too pervy even for me!

Don't the French know anything about placement?

Since when do lion tamers need guns?
As if clowns weren't scary enough all by themselves!

While this might be a suitable party game 
for your neighborhood 'swingers group'
it definitely doesn't belong in a kids gathering!

I think Lion has been to one too many kids parties 
with Poor Pussy!

Then George has a problem
and needs to be arrested!

Ditto for Teddy!

Again with the visuals, people!
I know exactly what Harpo's secret is...
I documented it several times every day for decades!

Unless this is from a book called 
"Urine for a big surprise",
I can't, for the life of me,
figure out why kids would need to know this - 
and, frankly, why I didn't!

IF I ever have grandchildren,
reading books at bedtime might be really tricky to get through 
if this is the caliber of what's out there!

I'm getting out Babar and Eloise
and giving them a new read tonight!

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