Give me a break!

I swear the Nebraska PD are on to me!

 I drive to New Jersey, 

Chicago,

Wisconsin

and Iowa all the freakin time

and nothing!

But, for some bizarre reason,

nothing at all to do with the fact 

that I drive 20 miles over the speed limit,

I get pulled over every single time I'm in NB!

Hey pal, I'm NOT going to go as slow as your tractors...

I'm hauling ass from two states away

and still have one more to go after y'all; 

My sciatic nerve is killing me 

from sitting on my ass for 12 hours 

and I haven't peed since the eastern part of Kansas!

It's getting dark.

There are NO people on the road, only three skunks,

two turtles

and an armadillo - 

 all of which survived my driving skills ...

what's the problem?

Oh, only a warning and not a ticket?!

That keeps my 'permanent record' 

spotlessly clean 

as you were surprised to discover

 when you ran my record...

thank you Officer;

have a nice day!